OSCAR.com: The OSCAR Night Blog with Joel Stein

Out of here

Thanks for multi-tasking with me.
It was pretty fun being backstage. Lots of famous people. Like being at the Ivy for lunch.
It went much faster than watching it. And I didn't watch one montage. So I feel very lucky.
I feel ike the end of camp. Everyone is hugging each other and giving each other cards. Apparently, I went to a very snotty camp where the kids had cards.
Good night. I'm off to the Governors Ball with my wife. Which is how the Oscars paid me. They're smart, those Oscars people.

I'm out on stage

All these people come up to the stage after. Cate Blanchett wanted a "pillow up her bum."  I told Amy Adams she wasn't wrinkled like she feared and she said she was relieved.  Spike Lee looks like he'll be the last to leave.  Jon Stewart's writers posed for pictures with him: They were under the stage IMing him jokes he used.   And I found out the one person excused form the dress code: Bruce Vilanch. Really ugly T-shirt and back pants.  Maybe that's his version of formal.

Guest blogger. returns: Jennifer Robinson, trophy presenter

That was fabulous. Martin Scorcese is very well respected. He smiled at me. I'm a part of history. Thank you.

There is a stage left

It's discouraged, but some people get to use it to avoid the press. Denzel, for instance.

How big are the Academy Awards?

I was five feet away, loking for a while, and I'm pretty sure Martin Scorcese got his eyebrows trimmed.

Guest blogger: Jennifer Robinson, trophy presenter

I've had an absolutely unbelievable time here. it's everything I ever imagined. I alsways thought that I would be on the Oscar stage. one day I'll be accepting an award for best actress. Tom Hanks, he's an angel. Absolutely an angel. His spirit. His presence. He was very nice to me. Cameron Diaz loves my dress. Well, the dress I'm wearing. I picked it out. Let me tell you what I'm wearing. Dena Bar-Rel is her name. The jewelry is by Raffinity.
I got the job because I auditioned. I have an agent. The last job I did was a print job for teeth whintening. And also did a hair ad.
I'm about to do Martin Scorcese. I'll be back.

Diablo Cody

She stared as a blogger, so as she walked by me with her award she said, "Go blog about it."
Okay: Diablo Cody was crying. And she just won an award under the name Diablo Cody. With a dress that exposed her tattoo. And she used to strip. She is a perfect reprenation of all the screenwriters I've met in L.A. Only slightly less short, male and Jewish.

More Tom Hanks Hankitudes!

He's backstage with his arm around the waist of the last Oscar winner woman for documentary right after she won, and he says, "It's a long way up from the seats to the stage, isn't it? But you didn't trip and you didn't say f***, so you're fine."

Guest blogger IDs

Christina is the brunette; Sandra is the redhead. Now you can enjoy their blogs much more

Dress code

Everyone – even the people pushing the sets on and off – are wearing black tie. The Oscars are not messing around, dress-code wise.